Love yourself a little more?

Dear me,

Yes, this one is for you dear! You’ve walked enough out there, wearing your heart on your sleeves. Pause and love yourself a little more, because on the days you wake up feeling blue, just like today, you might be the only one around you!

P.S. We do write long letters/ emails / messages to our acquaintances living in different parts of the world, right? Then how do we find it difficult to write to someone so close to us – US?! Considering the crunch in time we face from the daily rat-race, isn’t this supposed to be the nearest and convenient letter to post or send across – a letter to ourselves? We don’t need to step out of our homes or catch a taxi or take out our phones and tire our tiny fingers with all the typing. All that is required is just a calm place to shush your heart screaming out for attention, yes, your attention! Just sit down and listen to yourself; listen to all the little secrets you have been hiding from the world behind your beautiful smile!

Before you wonder and start to regret for putting the P.S. amidst a letter, when it’s supposed to be at the end, let me tell you: “It doesn’t always have to be perfect, and no one is. There is nothing in this world that is perfect, neither time nor a person. It’s on you to make a moment perfect. You can make mistakes just like anyone else does. You may meet a right person at the wrong time or vice versa. But you learn from these mistakes and if you don’t, then do give a knock on your head on my behalf! Well, glad you smiled reading that one; a smile sincere from your heart, the beautiful and honest smile I’ve been longing from you since long! So, hey listen, you don’t need to break yourself over and over with each mistake because it’s the mistakes that help you grow. Just stay strong enough to be there for yourself because I know the relay your over-exerting mind and heart plays by passing on the baton of thoughts, is the toughest race you need to win. So, save some fuel in you, for yourself.”

Understand that it’s fine if your social battery has drained off, I mean how can it not? I’m indeed surprised that you came along this far, while holding onto the broken pieces of your heart. It’s high time that you understand that you were trying to complete your life’s jigsaw puzzle by looking for the missing piece in someone else’s hand, when it was always there, hidden deep within your soul. All it takes is a look into yourself when you feel lost! You are an ocean of your own, where people can get lost if they care to venture. So, escape from the world and dive into this deep ocean until you hit rock bottom. It’s always fun to explore the unexplored, isn’t it?! See your heart unfold many secrets that you have been turning a blind eye to and remember that you are an adventure of your own!

It’s ok to overthink about the little things, questioning your life, and breaking down. In fact, you need to be proud of yourself for having a heart that bleeds in this world of scarce emotions. You care a lot and hence hurt a lot. On those days, do remember your favourite quote from TFIOS: “Without pain, how could we know joy?” And do remember that it is also OK to feel numb! It happens and it’s just a phase that will pass by. Even, rocks crumble and so will your heart start to feel again.

Don’t let the world change you. You are loved for who you are, so you do you my dear! Be there for yourself, because you are the nearest person you can run to when you feel lost in this world. And, mostly because you know you are lazy, and it is more convenient that way!

Get out of the bed and stop sulking because you are meant to shine bright. Do not give the rights to anyone else to dull your sparkle because it is only this spark that can guide you back to home- YOU!

So, on the days you feel blue, just go with the flow! Do everything that you want to even if it is as crazy as it may sound or do nothing at all. Take yourself out or shut the world behind your doors and enjoy solitude with a cup of tea or by just lying on the bed wrapped in your blanket. Go to the beach and just listen to the waves lash at the shore or sit in your balcony and stare down at the world running here and there or stare into the walls of your apartment right to horizon. Cry your eyes out or laugh like a lunatic. Starve until your stomach growls or eat until you can’t squeeze in a morsel more. Laze around in your over-sized pyjamas or fit into the attire that brings out the confidence in you. Watch your favourite series all over again or disconnect yourself from the gadgets around you. Cook a meal for yourself and laugh over the mess you created in the kitchen or order in your go-to meal and gobble it down. Have a long hot shower or walk like a mess.

All that I’m reminding you is, be the way you want and give your soul a break, because I love you and I can’t see you break down. You are my happy place; always have and always will be! There is no one who can replace you and none that I’d wish would take your place.

Knowing how you are, I know you’ll overthink many more times and shatter into tinier pieces. But do me a favour and love yourself a little more?

Sincerely,

ME.

P.S. We are in a world where we can describe anything and everything but when asked to talk about ourselves, we pause, we hesitate! A world where we find answers to any question just a click away, but never able to find an answer to, “Who am I?” because that’s an answer unique to each one of us and an answer that can be answered just by us! Are we that horrible to not be loved or cared for? If the answer is a yes, then my friend you are making the second mistake of expecting to find love from people around you. Yes, the second mistake! Because, the first mistake is that you are missing out on something precious than a gem in search of something/someone that is incomparable with you!

Why do you love me?!

How powerful are those three words;” I love you!”?! Easily given away, but when you need to support your statement, you find yourself at a loss of words!

In an hour-long video call between the long-distance couple, she gave him a 20-minute list on why she felt things were going to be difficult for them. He paused her and asked just a question, “Why do you love me?”! Those were the few times; her non-stop chattering found a sudden full-stop and the perfect curve her lips made while she smiled, turned into a straight line. She never could find the right answer to provide him with. She didn’t want to hurt him rather, as she felt she never had the right choice of words for such situations. He calmly asked her once again, breaking the silence, “Why do you love me? You found a never-ending list of things for why you feel we don’t stand a chance. But tell me, how did this begin in the first place? If you can answer that question you’ve been dodging since ever, I’ll listen to you rant for however long you wish to!”

They just gazed at each other, because they knew what they felt was something that no word in the English dictionary could do justice to. The silence that prevailed, was broken by their hearts that beat louder! Their heart wanted to step in and remind them about what they felt for each other, but it was side-lined once again by the mind playing a game of just snakes & snakes. Yes, a game with no ladders to pull them out of the mess going through their heads! All they had to believe was in themselves; not as individuals but as “one”. But the what-ifs roared louder with no answers and those questions summoned them once again at the court of love. They pleaded mercy with all their might but were found guilty because they let the questions question the most vulnerable yet beautiful feeling, love!

She wanted him to be there for her till the end, though knowing he was no prince charming who rode a white horse. She knew his love and care mattered much more than the struggles that they would have to go through if the future saw them together. They were ready to fight anyone and anything, that stood in their way of love. Little did they know that a rather devastating war had to be fought with their own minds, a war that left both at loss!

She let out a sigh and whispered, “I Love You!”. Yes, those three words hid an ocean of emotions and were the only words that could answer his question. He knew she never gave away those words that easily and if she said it, it’s because she meant it. She used to never answer to his “I love you-s” or “I miss you-s” with a “You too”. But when she said it; it felt so magnetic that those words left him with goosebumps.

With this, a tear trickled down her cheek and it broke him knowing that he wasn’t next to her to wipe it off. She quickly wiped it off and thanked him for being there for her every time she felt the world was pulling her down. But, what an irony right? Her world itself was drowning in front of her eyes, and all she could do was to watch helplessly. She managed to pull herself up and gasped, ”Love alone is not enough for two people to live together happily. Families matter. Time matters and it waits for none. So, I guess, this is it! We don’t stand a chance, do we?” Her eyes looked up at him, with hope.

Now, a tear trickled down his cheek. He could feel a lump in his throat and him choking on words that he knew was not enough to make her stay. He managed to let out the words trying to break-free; “I don’t want to lose you, because you are my happy place too. But I can’t be selfish enough to keep you waiting, without giving you the assurance you are asking for.”

They nodded in agreement and tried to smile because their smile was each other’s strength. They didn’t want to keep the call, as they knew that could be the last time, they saw each other, until sometime in near future (fingers crossed). They wanted to meet one last time, but felt, it would have been all the more difficult to break-off from their tight hug and walk away. They thanked the invention of technology, for making things a tad easier.

They wanted it to end on a happy note and hence started recollecting all the beautiful moments they shared. Though, they smiled on the outside, their hearts were breaking into pieces with each memory shared, because they knew there will be never an end to discussing this as each moment they spent together happily or fighting, was worth it! They grew together and was each other’s support system. They were each other’s home, that one’d want to crash into after a long day!

The villain finally stepped in; the message that read: “Your data pack is about to get over….” They knew it was the end, an end so shattering after a long and beautiful run of 5 years. They never regretted that they met each other but was rather glad they got to spend some cherish-able moments together. Yes, their 5 years were going to end in 5 minutes! They didn’t waste those few minutes by speaking because they knew words meant nothing. They stared at each other, letting the tears roll down their cheeks, trying to capture those last few moments. They could see the 5 years they spent, flash in front of their eyes and their future snap into nothing, at the blink of their eyes! The phone beeped, and she let out a sigh, “I guess, this is it!”.

The screen went blank, and they both broke down, at different corners of the world!

P.S. Some people travel like parallel lines in a hope to meet at infinity, and some cross each other at an intersection and never meet again. Both are worth it, if you find peace and happiness, because that’s what’s missing in our busy lives and something we yearn for at the end of the day!

Just this one last time?!

A long-forgotten yet a beautiful story! Currently, that’s what I like to call that chapter in my life, whenever anyone shoots the most cliché post-breakup question towards me: “Have you moved on?!” Well by long-forgotten; please do not take the literal meaning out of it, my dear readers. I just ought to let you know that it’s been long enough for you to forget that and update yourself with new gossips. C’mon, I get the part that this story was once the talk in the city. But as necessary it is for me to move on, so is it for you! I’m done listening to all the sympathies and ‘awwws’ you would let out on hearing my short lived romantic story. I try to put enough full stops to that tale but you, the society, are just like the wind obstructing me from moving on to the next page. You blow in the wrong direction all over again; now you are supposed to help me in the direction of turning pages and then you were to blow in such a way that would pull her close to me. How can you mess it up every single time?! I hope my story is enough to let you know that you are invented to keep the dear ones close and keep the strangers off!!

Well, I’m kind of going off-track because my dear society, I’m not going to give you any more attention, at least that’s not what I wish to after all these years. I once had given you enough attention but only to lose something precious than a gem to me. Yes, I lost her! I lost my love while I gave an ear to all those crappy questions you kept bombarding at me. I could never provide her with an answer to why I love her or why it felt like home beside her or an affirmation to a happily ever after. It is unbelievable that I gave a damn thought to what all you ever made me believe in, when I was ought to surrender my only thoughts to her, to us! And that’s something that I guess I’ll regret life-long. Her thoughts haunt me still and this time I won’t hesitate to shout it out to the world, against all those ears waiting to eavesdrop to what my heart wants to whisper; her name. I won’t let you hush me down and I won’t step back from this very last time I want to speak about her because since long, behind the pale smile I flash upon you, I have been gulping down words waiting to break free. I don’t want to suffocate up on such a mesmerizing thought because all I wish is to continue living knowing that I was lucky enough to meet an angel like her! I beg of you to not stop me, this one last time…

Her twinkling eyes beautifully drawn with her only favourite makeup ‘kajal’ used to hold me back in such a magnetic way that I could see the entire future we were to stumble upon together; she never paused to think before she casted her pearly whites between her perfectly curved lips and yes, I can still hear her giggle in the silliest yet cutest way amongst the crowded local trains I travel by daily; her butter-fingers used to carelessly intertwine between my long fingers hoping to find her name embossed on my ring finger one day; and I can never forget the way her hair used to sway and fall over her perfectly carved face waiting to be brushed away by my fingers, only to find her breath-taking gaze and smile! What an exclusive creation of God she is, with such a striking look and an even more gentle soul within! Hmph. I just wish I could rewind time and that I had not stood there blankly gazing at her as the tears streamed down waiting for it to be wiped off by me, yes me! What was I waiting for? But, how could I, knowing that I was the reason for those drops soaking my shirt collar as she clung onto me tightly praying to stay that close with me forever? It’s only because I listened to you, my dearest society! I was scared you would cause her more hurt than you would to me, which is why I let her go before it’s too late; I let her slip away from my arms.

Since then, I have been choking on words she wished to hear that day, and I still can feel her presence around me hoping to just hear my heart beat her name. I won’t hold back this time, my dear… “I loved you, and I still love you. I want to scream your name out loud and wait until the echoes reach you, just so that I can let you know that you still rule my heart and it only beats for you, until day! What we had is a long-forgotten story because I want to start a fresh one and I commit to you that it will be a happily ever-after tale as you wished for! I won’t let you slip away from my arms this time and I want to die in your arms instead. But……..Right now, I’m scared, not of the society but only about whether time defeated us; What if the fake story I delivered to them reached you and, this time you believed their little lies and moved far away from me and left me on my own?! What if I’m too late, too late to comprehend that once again the society overtook and defeated me, with the help of time; and that I’m at loss again, a loss so beautiful and irresistable?!”

P.S. So many of us let go of our love fearing what the future may bring to us, mainly worrying about what the society will think of us. Does it really matter what they think? Yes, for a meanwhile it may. But, they too will move on with their lives, right? If you left your love fearing some ‘may or may not happen’ incident, was is it really love? Yes, you may have left your loved one to prevent anymore hassles or sorrow because you can’t bear to see tears in your loved one’s eyes, but do remember that you will never be able to forget that one. Do give it a thought!

Oh! How I’d wish.. (Part-2)

When the wind caressed me,

I’d wish that your arms embraced me…

When the rain showered on me,

I’d wish to drown in your eyes…

When the sun beamed upon us,

I’d wish to see a shadow,

of us and not mine alone…

When the snow left me shivering,

I’d wish that I could melt in your love…

And, when the autumn leaves shed on us,

I’d wish that I could walk by the lane,

with you in a bridal dress…

I gave up all of me to you,

my wishes to fate,

my expectations to reality,

and all that I’d think of,

in my tiny little fantasy land.

only to enter a world,

a world of reality filled with obstacles;

to end with you and I!

Oh! How I wish I could,

elope to my dreamland,

where I had been assured

a happily-ever-after;

and escape from this chaotic life,

where you and I aren’t assured ;

the thought that makes me all jittery…

I had always wished that,

I’d never need to write,

about us or just you,

because I want you to live in my life,

and not in my poems!

P.S. Well, not everything in life happens the way we want because the main controller of each one of our lives, God, is watching over us, from up there! And, he’d definitely want only the best for us…Keep calm and go with the flow!

“Kol shaye yahdos le sabab” .. (Everything happens for a reason in Arabic)

Oh! How I’d wish.. (Part-1)

Your eyes read words,

that your lips refused to speak

and those I yearned to listen…

Our hearts did beat in sync,

but our silence roared louder!

Amid a crowded room,

I still felt lost,

not because people failed to

bring a smile on my face,

but because of the absence of that one,

who only tried to make my heart smile!

Dressed at my best,

just to strike a conversation with you,

like those you’d have with my colleagues;

but let alone being called a joker,

I realized I’d be the one you never compliment!

Yes! I do not wish you to be,

like the mirror in Snow-white’s story,,

but ever wondered if it’s fair,

to be just like the butter-paper,

when I reflect your emotions

just like a perfect mirror?!

That day, the way you revolted back,

when fingers were pointed towards

your parents, someone that dear to you;

I wished to be the one,

that you’d be possessive after them!

I wished for once, you’d stand for me,

the way you’d do for them,

even though I’d never get a raise

in your chart of life’s priority…

To be continued….

An incomplete story..

I pushed you quite far,

far away from me;

yet you live in my dreams..

Not that quite often as before,

but like the monsoon rain,

that shower these days..

We promised that we wouldn’t,

show up again,

as we bid farewell,

the last time we met;

but then I realized that,

actions do speak louder than words

’cause it seems like,

we show up in each other’s memories..

I don’t regret all those,

memorable moments that you gave me;

all I regret is my choice,

to live and die in your arms;

my decision to let you,

be the reason behind my,

tears of happiness and the,

cause of the scariest chaos;

the chaos in my once peaceful soul!

You were the rose in my paradise,

that left pleasant memories,

just like it’s fragrance,

and also like the thorns,

that left scars on those memories,

as we approached the deadline;

the deadline to our ‘happily-ever-after’ story..

I chase you in my dreams,

then, now and forever;

but now as I open my eyes,

I wake up to reality;

A reality where,

“We” live in the pics of my photo gallery,

and what is left is just “You” and “I“..

We proved to be cowards,

in the battlefield of love,

where neither distance,

nor religion separated us;

but the four letter words,

‘Love’ and ‘Fear’ got interchanged;

the fear to hold hands together,

as we scripted a beautiful saga,

to carry with us to heaven..

You are just one call away,

and so is the DEL button,

but my heart skips a beat,

every time I hear your name,

when I haven’t seen you in so long..

At that I wonder,

have I really moved on?!

And my heart just flashes,

a pale smile..

College – An unforgettable chapter!

“Abhi padhai karo aur college mei khooob enjoy karo (Study now and enjoy later in college) !! “, “Arey yaar, dekho na college ke log kitna enjoy kar rahe haii, bas ye tuitions aur ratna khatam karna haii (Look at how the college students enjoy, all we have to do is get done with all these tutions and the mugging up) !!”, “college mei sirf 3 cheeze chalte hai (The only three things that run in college) – ENTERTAINMENT, ENJOYMENT and FREEDOM“, etc.; these are few common exclamations heard and told during our school days. But is college life this simple?! Read on to get a glimpse of reality. Firstly, let’s get your facts right, “College life isn’t that sweet as it seems. It’s time to apply what you learnt in your course of English: Do not judge a book by its cover! College actually runs on 3 things: LIFE LESSONS, SELF REALIZATION and MEMORIES.

In today’s world, especially in India, college education is something that isn’t that effective (Not being a pessimist here!). It’s all about creating robots who are really great at mugging up things and passing exams using illegal methods! Is that seriously what you expect from education; to leave you so helpless that you have to eventually use shameful ways to just cope with the rest of the ‘muggers’ and create a good impression in front of others!? What are you gaining? What about the “Honesty is the best policy” part taught to you at school? Isn’t it enough of ‘just-bookish-knowledge’ we get till our higher secondary?! Don’t you expect a bit of application or a pre-experience before you enter your work-life? Well the irony is that apart from the work-related education you expect, you really do learn a lot of valuable life lessons. You grow as an individual. Those 4-5 years of college life will take you through a roller-coaster of life with so many ups and downs, people entering and leaving, etc. Few of the qualities which will definitely be noticeable:

Independence:

There will be no extra tuitions for you in college. Enjoy those school tuition days. It may be tiring but when you move ahead, it’s something that definitely will make you look back for! All those munching in between the classes, ringing bells of random houses after classes, cycling or taking a ride back home where your mom awaits you with a wholesome meal ready and so on. Didn’t you just picturize it as you read through?! So, here’s to the young tots waiting to escape school and join college, I’d love to tell you that “Jee Le Apni Zindagi (Live your life)” doesn’t exactly have to wait until you join college. All you have to do is just enjoy each and every moment that life has gifted you with, whether you are young or old and studying or working! Competition is seen everywhere just so that you get noticed or get first preferences. It is very important to know that since our colleges and society emphasize on competitive spirit, not everyone’s going to help you always, atleast not before one night (An Engineer’s study begins one night before the exam!). ‘Serve Yourself First!’ – A place on land where the Airline rule applies is definitely college!

Value of Money:

Though it’s your parents’ money you are still spending, when you give it away with your own hand it does make a lot of difference. The reluctance to spend it even on the 45 Rs sandwich in the college canteen will be seen. End of month common phrases like “Bro, cover me for today’s dinner, I’m really tight”, “no more outings until I get cash, I’m broke!” etc. will help you set your priorities right. Common places like pani-puri and vadapav stalls, sugarcane juice counter will be your KFCs, Café Coffee Days and Baskin Robbins for few years. College definitely brings out the ‘Kanjoos’ (miser) in you! No offences to the girlfriends out there, but it’s quite necessary to understand and accept the fact that your boyfriend hasn’t started earning for himself and he’s still depending on his parent’s cash. So, it will be quite advisable that you expect a little less than a ZARA clothing or a candle-light date at The Taj Hotel and settle for something which is inexpensive yet a precious gift and what mature people call as time! (No offences again, just a tip. Take it if you want or leave it as it is!)

True relations:

Good company gives you good memories and bad ones give you regrets! Obviously you already do have a notion that it’s going to be difficult trying to make new friends or adapt to the new culture and surroundings or find your way alone without any supervision of your parents who were there to guide you until they left you here. But can you do anything about it? Are you going to run away on your first day refusing to give it a try or are you going to make your life worthwhile by connecting to a few people who sticks to you like UHU for the rest of your life (or luckily atleast till you graduate)? You’ll get to know the value of relations in this 4-5 years of college. The type of people you connect with or the right relations will reflect yourself. You’ll get to know what kind of a person you are, what’s your aim in life and what all interests you! Either you become an independent person or just a push-over. Think wisely while choosing your ‘group’ ‘cause you definitely want to complete that bucket-list of yours without any hassles or regrets!

Power of family:

You’ll definitely love the freedom you get in college, with no one to yell at you or restrict or keep an eye on you! You would have been waiting to run and join a hostel soon to get the luxuries you thought to enjoy. Believe me or not, atleast before your first semester break you’d be eagerly waiting to rush home from the ‘so called heaven’ that your seniors mentioned that it’d be! There will be days when you are just dying to rush home at a blink of an eye (Bhagwaan sabko ek Doraemon ka ‘anywhere door’ de dena!), crave for your mother’s hand-made food, listen to dad’s scolding just to let go of that regret building in you ’cause of some really crazy thing you did or his teddy bear hugs when you are sad, fights with siblings (Miss fighting with them for the remote) or the pampering and care from your grandparents. For a change, you’ll feel happy when they scold you. Tears of happiness will dwell in your eyes when you know that, no matter what, they are always there for you. You’ll find comfort talking to them than the friends near to you.

Memories:

First thing that flashes in your mind when you talk about college memories are those hostel days and definitely the trips or the treks you went for. How many sleep-overs have you craved for during your school days? You get it now every single night, with late-night gossip sessions (for girls) and gaming sessions (for boys), mid-night movies and crazy Birthday celebrations (with loads of free GPLs and cake smearings). The moment you enter college for your alumni meeting, it will be like entering a maze of memories. You’ll remember how you spent time with your friends under the huge tree during a sunny day, bunked classes to eat at the college canteen, punctured your professor’s vehicle (if you were the crazy lot) or rather used someone’s cycle and left it back at the same spot without the latter knowing, the lawns where you and your lover used to spend time gazing at the stars or talking about a happy future (which may or may not have continued after college), the classrooms where you would have luckily spent some good amount of time with the faculties (trying to maintain 70% attendance), the labs where you had broken something, the mess food which you somehow gulped down during your ‘broke scenes’, the security guard whistling right into your ears when you were upto some mischief and so on….

Oh well, etc. does really mean ‘end of thinking capacity’ and I’m pretty sure that especially the college lecturers are quite familiar with this term. Thanks to us students, we know we are awesome as we end most of our theoretical answers with an etc. even if it’s a single point that we mentioned! :p

P.S. No matter what you expect or regret or gain, live your college life to the fullest and enjoy while you can, for these days shall never return! YOLO! 😀

Life after falling out of love..

Do we really fall “out” of love? Umm, well the answer is a no! You indeed just fall deeper and deeper “in” love.. But yea, you do learn to live without your “soul mate”, with days passing by, which is totally a different thing, yet sadly a common trend of this generation..

Drenched pillows, insomniac nights, and what all followed that day were just nightmares in short.. Lying on his mother’s lap with her gentle hands brushing his hair; nor a talk with her bestie for hours on phone could fix the damage they felt! They knew it was the end of their journey together.. Yet, their heart stayed well-connected.. They shared a common lie when they met even after years, “Yes, I’m fine ” ,though the words muffled and their eyes spoke volume.. All they longed to see was each other’s smile and they didn’t mind fighting back the stream of tears for that moment.. Priorities never changed.. They remained at the top of each other’s Facebook search list even after months, just the way they used to top each other’s chat list few years back.. Late-night surprises and wishes on birthday changed into confining themselves into their own room and numerous statuses or backspaced messages that their gadgets witnessed..

She wished for “online” to change into “typing” , each time she stalked him in WhatsApp .. Little did she realize that, the person on the other side of the screen wished for the same too.. Love never left them but ego surely did come into scene with fatal power.. She searched for him in each and every guy she encountered later.. But it was all in vain !! Her flawless smile could be only seen in his dreams and in the photos that filled his mobile gallery.. He longed to feel her soft fingers in his hand and hold her close to him and so did she wish to melt in the warmth , his arms once provided.. She knew his love was the drug she needed to cure her neurotic nights and that no psychiatrist in this world could prescribe it rightly.. So did he know that she was the reason for his existence in this unfair world.. They were two people connected by their souls, indulged in a process of helping each other grow in all aspects of life; which couldn’t be carried out by anyone else so flawlessly like they did …

She remembered those days with teary eyes, where she secretly wished him to stay every time she said a “bye” .. She still remembered that night where they bid farewell to each other for one last time.. She wished to be the backspace to all the frustration and depression he felt at 2 am.. Who told boys never shed tears?? Little did she know that , each time he put a smile on her face while she felt sad , he was giving away his own smile and that he slept with damp eyes on the other side of the phone.. He had always kept his word of taking care of all her problems and assuring a goodnight sleep to her.. Yes, he lied that he was fine each time she sensed a change in his tone.. But a lie to keep a person happy was not a sin, he believed..

He never fell so hard as he fell every time he saw her smile.. Since the day they stopped hearing each other’s goodnight, fitful nights of sleep had creeped in.. Each time they heard each other’s name, it felt traumatic and their heart skipped a beat.. After every fight they had had, they came a bit more closer to each other.. Every sacrifice, compromise, adjustment and the long wait to meet each other was worth it.. But now they could live together only in a parallel universe which their hearts made, led by the ever-destroying ‘egoism‘ ..

P.S. Loving oneself is obviously the utmost priority because it’s just ‘you for yourself’, at the end of the day. You come alone to this world and you leave alone. But, never forget the people who are willingly spending their time on earth, trying to live beside you. Ego, though a tiny word has the power to stab a little longer and a more meaningful word, love! Be a bigger person,skip the E and let it GO!

Some Say..

Some say, Love’s a crazy feeling,
where you lose all your other senses..
But what if you are ready,
to set fire to your senses
for that one crazy soul?!

Some say, Love’s a beautiful feeling,
where you don’t have to get it right,
like Romeo & Juliet..
But be like that,
Grandpa & Grandma who spent,
amazing times together,
ignoring each others flaws;
laughing their hearts out,
through those teethless gums..

Some say Love’s gonna tear us apart,
in such a way that,
you feel lost without your better half..
Ain’t that true?!
But shouldn’t you be there,
for yourself always,
because you die alone eventually?

Some say Love’s a funny feeling,
where you don’t know,
what happens to you..
Your tummy turns into a kaleidoscope,
you see them everywhere;
But don’t you think,
you do need to add an,
eenie meenie pinch of fun factor,
to make your life intersting;
and for sure ,
someone to look & smile at?!

Some say Love’s gonna kill you,
where only the sincere one gets,
stabbed to death!
But, can you deny the fact that,
once born you have to die?
You got no option buddy,
go ahead, explore and love fearless;
or else you’re just gonna,
die a little, every single day..

Some say Love’s a special feeling,
where two souls become one,
YOU and I becomes WE,
and hell turns into paradise;
just ’cause of that one promise,
a promise to be together,
let it be then, now or forever..
But, never forget that,
your story is written,
in a unique and special way..

Some say Love’s all about trial and error,
where it ain’t necessary to get it right,
at the first shot itself..
But ever wondered,
if you lost your faith in love,
just ’cause of that one wrong person,
you are just,
just one step behind in,
findng your soulmate,
and they are still alone in this world,
waiting for you?!

Some say Love’s scary,
where you’ll be scared of dejection,
scared of losing your partner,
or scared to hear a ‘Goodbye’ from them..
But isn’t it more scarier,
scarier to know that,
these things in your mind,
are gonna taunt you 24/7,
’cause you know obviously,
Mind can be the worst Enemy at times?!
So, go out there and express yourself,
it may or may not happen,
why not give it a try?!
Waiting can hurt,
but what’s more painful,
is to forget somone,
someone you love!

Some say, some say,
Oh hold on!
What does it matter,
what those ‘some’ say?!
What matters is what,
your heart says,
your mind says,
and that’s what exactly counts!

Don’t you wanna experience,
those sweet and lovely moments,
with that perfect person?!
Don’t you wanna complete yourself,
with your better half?!
No one’s in a hurry alright!?
Just be patient and wait for the right one,
’cause you can’t rewrite the story;
the amazing ‘HAPPILY EVER AFTER’ story,
God has written for you;
But definitely add your bit of touch to it..

P.S. It’s not gonna be like any other love stories, because you are unique and God has added a unique touch to your story too..
A kid once asked God, “If you have written my story, why should I take any efforts? I’ll just go with the flow”, to which He replied that, ” You shouldn’t just sit back and watch.. It’s probably cause at few places, I have written ‘As you wish’ ” …

Your dreams are mine now..

Time fast forwarded?? Check !! She tried to pause that moment and unclutter her mind for now, but it was all in vain. Yes, trying to stop her mind from wandering through the unwanted path she once strolled along with him, was what she wished for now !! She was strangled in the world’s biggest prison- her mind, which she has been trying to elope from, but this time alone.
As her mind played a game of “Twister“, she managed to pull out a pale smile to flash upon the world. Surprisingly, the only bright thing she beheld after a series of tragedies was her smile. Her lips were a barren desert, baring a stark to her pair of dark clouds which have cried a million rivers..
She leaned on the walls, wishing it’d be his shoulders; her fingers intertwined with not his, but hers to pray to the Almighty; her eyes searched for his’, though all she could stare was at the dim walls. She had lost the spark in her eyes, as his eyes were the mirror that caused such a magnificent reflection, she proclaimed.
She didn’t want anyone else to see her, hear her, console her. She was all cold; she wanted warmth which only his arms could provide; she wanted to listen to his heartbeats but they no longer beat for her. She sighed, “your dreams are mine now”, and her voice echoed in that little, empty room. Yes, she had to live to fulfill her dreams, his dream.!